Bernat Crochet-A-Long

I posted back in January about a crochet-a-long (CAL) that Bernat was doing and I decided to join in.  I have never done one before so thought it might be fun.

I bought my pretty yarn right away

Then.... less than a week later, my whole world changed - I mentioned it here but since I try to keep my blog happy and upbeat, I didn't write too much about it.  But truth be known, it has been extremely difficult, even while typing this I have tears rolling down my face.  Some days it takes ever ounce of strength God gives me to make it through the day.  I've been very, very sad and depressed and quite frankly don't even feel like getting out of bed most days but I have to and I know daddy wants me to be happy - that was his goal most of his life, to provide for his family and make us happy.  So I try..it is hard but I try.

But because of that I had no desire to crochet or do anything else for that matter.  I already had a trip planned in February, long before daddy even got sick so I went on the trip and it was good for me.  The week I went on the trip was actually the week for CLUE 1 of the CAL and since I was gone, I couldn't start the afghan.  When I returned home, the grieving process continued so it was a couple of weeks before I actually took out the hook and completed it

CLUE 1 - Completed

Clue 1 was very easy and if I had been myself, the way I used to be, I would I could have easily have finished this clue in one evening.  However, dealing with depression and grief...it took me about 2 weeks - I would work on a square here and there and forget it about it a few days, just not wanting to deal with anything.

After I finished those, I was ready to start CLUE 2

I finished one of the motifs rather quickly.  While I was on Clue 2 - the rest of the CAL group was on clue 5, so I was a bit behind, something like that would have drove me crazy in the past but I decided it is not a race.  I'm going to finish this afghan but I don't have to do it in record time.  I wonder if most of the ladies in the CAL work full time jobs (I work at least 60 + hours in a high-positioned job), do they have any help around the house (I don't - all housework, yard work, home repairs, appointments, bill paying, etc) are up to me.  Are they depressed, are they grieving?  So... I said "It isn't a race" - it is supposed to be enjoyable,

I've finished 4 of the 6 motifs so far - I worked up those 4 pretty quick but since then, have been so busy at work and still just don't have much of a desire to do other things

Now let me tell you more about the CAL.  Everyone is finished, except for me of course.  But there are a few things that are bothering me.   #1, I'm not especially fond of the finished look - it is so ... so ... unsymmetrical and I am a Libra so symmetry is important to me.  #2 We were told the CAL would be 15 weeks - but not a clue every week, some weeks would be catch-up weeks.

We only had 1 catch up week (clue 6 I think) and by the end of week 8, the afghan was done and they were telling us how to add the border.  What?  So now they say the next few weeks are going to be for contest - so half of the weeks are not really part of the CAL - they are for contest.  Contest are fine but that should be AFTER the CAL or maybe the last week of it but not the last 7 weeks of it !!

I just feel like if the CAL was only going to be 8 weeks, then say it is 8 weeks - don't say 15 when it is only 8.  I feel a little jipped.  Like they just got tired of putting out clues so said "Uh, yeah, we're done - there you go"

I am going to continue and finish up the afghan, even though I would not make a pattern like this - it will be a challenge for me and teach me some different motifs and I really do LOVE the yarn.  I won't be able to enter the contest - the deadline is May 7th and I won't have it done by then I know.

I wish I had done the knitted one (which looks like a quilt) - I like the look of it but I am a slow knitter and it would take too long, plus I like to crochet more than I like to knit.  Oh well... you take a chance with a Mystery CAL - I'll post my progress - wish me luck.

UPDATE: June 2012:  I really do not like the finished look of the afghan so decided not to continue with this pattern after all..... stay tuned for what I decide to use the yarn for instead (I'm still looking for the right project)